something to laugh over.

When you come out of a 200-mcq-question paper and laugh over it even though you know that you played the guessing game for at least one-third of the questions (not because you didn't study but because there were just too many details, it was impossible to study them all), you know that you have let go of what grades mean to you...

And after laughing, you thank God for who He created you to be, not so that you need to meet up to the expectations the world piles on you, or because you have to prove anything, you know that you are secure in the Lord. And look forward to saying 'yes' to what He has placed ahead of you.

Even if i get the pink letter, (haha, some of you know what this means) i know- i want my treasures to be those of eternal value.
In all that i do, i desire to give my best shot because You are with me every step of the way, and i will learn to look and smile at the scenery beside the path instead of the only focusing on the winding road ahead.
And no matter the results, i choose to say- God, You are good, and Your mercies endure forever.
Smiles.

loving my family...more.

Last night, while we (cheryl, suhui, jeanie, sam and hann) were having dinner, i mentioned something about my capacity to be irritated with my family members. And what the rest replied set me thinking about my attitude towards my family. There were comments along the lines of, "i never seen rach irritated before..." and "you will be irritated one meh?". And at that moment i thought to myself why this was the case but the topic soon dropped as we carried on with dinner. I didn't think of it anymore thereafter.

Then this morning as i was reading the word, the Lord reminded me of it again. As i prayed asking the Spirit to work in my life and help me bear the fruits that i may reflect Christ, (2 Cor 3:18) the Lord reminded me of how i treat my family members. Many times i will get irritated with them when they ask me to do little things, or when i am busy and mummy asks for a favour and i say things that are not very pleasant. As i reflected upon that, i begin to realise that i don't treat my friends like that at all. Do i not love my family? No, i love them very much. Then, am i living a double standard life? Perhaps, perhaps not. You know, i figured that love and familiarity is a very complex thing. Maybe we have been brought up to act prosocially- meaning i know how to behave when i am out with my friends, however, when i am at home, the expectations are different, familiarity breds a sense that i don't have to behave so "properly" because my family knows me. Or rather, i expect that we will accomodate to each other because we know each other so well. So, "don't ask me for a favour when you know i am busy" kind of expectations pop up. That of course is not to say that i don't mean the things i do or say to people when i am outside and that i am putting up a front. No, all that i do is sincere and genuine- out of a desire to really want to love.

However, as i know the Lord more, i strive to treat my family with the same respect and patience as i treat my friends and other people i meet. Because what's the point of leaving good impressions but yet being unkind at home? (even though i don't mean it...?) Not a very good example to hold.

Lord, help me never to compartmentalize my life- And grant me a controlled tongue when i am at home, to say things that will build my family up. I want to display Your fruits at home more.

assured.encouraged.renewed.

Assured...Encouraged...Renewed...

Smiles. That was exactly what we've been waiting for.

Just that assurance that all our efforts have not gone to waste or returned to us void.

It was such an amazing time. Right, esther, raymond and brenda?

Join us every saturday for the 3:45 prayer time for the YA ministry. :)

to a land not too far away.

It has been confirmed. Come this May, I will be going for ACTS.
And that means being in Nepal for 2 and a half months. Smiles.
I will be leaving on either the 21st or 28th of May 2007. This is to be confirmed.
I am really excited because in know God has great lessons in store for me to learn.
However, i am also slightly apprehensive about how things will be there.
But i choose to trust. Because my God IS trustworthy.

I have been thinking alot about this and some other things as well.
Thank You for reminding me with Philippians 4:6-7.
Will update you all more about the trip and how you can be praying together with me.
Smiles.
Right now, i think i better go get a shower and clear my thoughts a bit.
Lord, continue to be my guide and my desire. Amen.

the measure of a man.

I know its 1:52am in the morning and i really ought to be in bed if i want to have a productive day tomorrow studying but i just have to post this up because God deserves this exaltation here. Just as i was going to shut down my computer, this song played on my itunes and it describes exactly what i am feeling tonight.

The Measure of a Man

By 4HIM

Verse 1:

This world can analyze and size you up

And throw you on the scales

They can IQ you and run you through

Their rigorous details

The can do their best to rate you

And they'll place you on their charts

And back it up with scientific smarts

But there's more to what you're worth

Than what human eyes can see

Chorus:

Oh I say the measure of a man

Is not how tall you stand

How wealthy or intelligent you are

I found out the measure of a man

God knows and understands

For He looks inside to the bottom your heart

And what's in the heart defines

The measure of a man

Verse 2:

Well you can doubt your worth

And search for who you are and where you stand

But God made you in His image

When He formed you in His hands

And He looks at you with mercy

And He sees you through His love

You're His child and that will always be enough

For there's more to what you're worth

Than you can ever comprehend

Bridge:

You can spend your life pursuing physical perfection

There is so much more, more than ever meets the eye

For God looks through the surface

And He defines your worth by,

What is on the inside

Truly, this is what You are teaching me today. That Lord, You are not looking at how tall i stand, or how much i can achieve. No matter how i feel about the things i have done, You remind me that these are not things that define my worth. You look at the heart- That defines who You created me to be. This imperfect child of Yours submits to what you have in store for me. I will not despise what You have called and created me to do, but instead Lord, help me to embrace all that you desire for my life. I need You to help me do that- to excel in what You want me to because on my own i really can't. Only You can help me with that. I really need Your grace, because i can never measure up. And that is truly what grace is for isn't it?

Thank You Lord, for that sweet presence and assurance when i need it tonight.

Good night world for now...

I'm looking forward to tomorrow, 'cause tomorrow's mercies are new, how wonderful. :)

isn't it love.

Isn't It Love
Words and music by Andrew Peterson

Lost my luggage out in Kalamazoo
Same way I tend to lose my conscience too
Another day in these dirty old blues
And I don't seem to mind

This is a thing that confounds me
You can find me, you surround and remind me
When I lose my way and I forget about you
You still remember me

Chorus:
Isn't it love
This rain that falls on the sinner and the saint
Isn't it love
This well that won't run dry
Isn't it love
These mercies are made new every morning

And when I think about that prodigal son
I've gotta smile when I see the old man run
And I know that you love us the same
'Cause the sun came up today

Just as if we deserved it
Just as if every one of us fools was worth it
Truth is that we'll never be perfect
But you love us just the same

Isn't it love to look down from the sky
And see your only son on the cross asking why
And somehow let him die that way
And not call the whole thing off

All for a man here in Kalamazoo
Who loses his bags and his way sometimes, too
But that was something that you already knew
And still you died for me

For the muddlehead i can be, the mistakes i make, how disobedient i can be, and yet, You still choose to love me. THAT, my friend, is pure grace.

His mercy and comfort.

How amazing that this is the God that we worship! 2 Corinthians 1 encourages us through these verses (NLT version),

"All praise to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. He is the source of every mercy and the God who comforts us. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us." (v3-4)

So we know that every "trial" and circumstance that we go through is never wasted. Every down period that we experience is so that we can taste His mercy and comfort. To know that we have a God who provides even for our emotional needs. And with these experiences, we can then comfort others and encourage them with what the Lord has brought us through. So never despise what you went through- God has His plan and purposes and will turn what is seemingly bad for His glory.

"... In fact, we expected to die. But as a result, we learned not to rely on ourselves, but on God who can raise the dead. And he did deliver us from mortal danger. And we are confident that he will continue to deliver us." (v9-10)

Very often, when we go through difficult times, it is a time where we will learn what it means to rely on Christ. To depend on Him. Simple prayers of deliverance are uttered. But my question on the flip side is, what about in times when things are going smoothly? Do we rely on what we can do, and forget that God exists? Confidence in a God who can deliver us translates to good times as well. This is because we experience Him through tough times and know who He is. Our faith is strengthed and we now trust Him in our every circumstance, joy or sorrow.

"He will rescue us because you are helping by praying for us. As a result, many will give thanks to God because so many people's prayers for our safety have been answered." (v11)

Lastly, let's keep our brothers and sisters in Christ in prayer. We can support each other through the prayers we utter for one other. Do you know someone who is hurting? Or needs comfort? Pray. Of course, be there for them as well. And be the source of comfort that God uses in their life. At the end of the day, God gets all the glory because of the praises we have when our prayers are answered.

I am blessed by these few verses and discover new truths each time i meditate on it. And because of that, i realize more and more that i will really never know enough. This is the wonder of the word of God, it reveals, and the Spirit convicts. Amazing.

Have you been chewing on the word of God? :)

no turning back.

The past is in the past.
There is no need to revisit it anymore.
The decisions, whether good or bad, were made.
It was a choice. And You were there when i made it.
So, really, it's about the process, not the results.
Thank You Lord for every struggle You brought me through, there's no turning back, i look forward to all that You have prepared for me. Smiles.

Look forward too, will you?

so sweet.

Wah, this is so sweet. Grins. Be sure to watch it till the end. Smiles. Otters are such pretty creatures. God is so creative. Heh.

humbled again and again.

Time and time again i have been greatly humbled. When i think that i can do it and i've got things going for me, that's when God throws it at me and leaves me helpless and needing Him. It's certainly not easy being a Christian, in fact, more and more, i begin to see what it means by "deny yourself, take up the cross and follow me."

Today, as i met the youths in Crossroads and listened and observed some of the things that are happening around in their lives, i felt overwhelmed with the some of the things they were facing. I asked myself if i was effective and adequate in helping them- i don't know what to say or how to advise, neither do i see anyway where i can seem to meet their needs. And the Lord in His grace and mercy reminded me this: Rach, you are not God. And that simple truth hit me straight in my face. It was me again trying to do things, wanting to change circumstances, wishing i could be in control of situations. And when i went down on my knees in utter submission telling God that i am limited and i can't, who He is was being magnified. His infinity and magnificance became all i could see. And i know that God loves the kids in Crossroad unconditionally. My responsibility is really to point them to Him, to the one who is more than able to meet their needs, give them peace, joy and satisfaction and be their friend. So often, i am caught up in the "i don't seem to be doing enough", "is there something that is lacking in all my service?" but John Piper puts it so beautifully when he writes,

"The uniqueness at the heart of Christianity is the glory of God manifest in the freedom of grace. God is glorious because he does not need the nations to work for him. He is free to work for them. 'The Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many' (Mark 10:45) Missions is not a recruitment project for God's labor force. it is a liberation project from the heavy burdens and the hard yokes of other gods. (Matt.11:28-30)"

- John Piper in Let the nations be glad (Bold emphasis mine)

This few lines struck me. Many times, our God is portrayed as a God who needs us to work for Him, slog for Him, give our energy and time for Him, be all tired out n burnt for Him and this description makes Him sound somewhat like a slave driver! I am certainly not condoning that we do not do anything for Christ and just sit back, slack and enjoy life. But the truth that i am placing across is that God has to be glorified in all that we do! and we need to be constantly aware that we can NEVER do enough for Him, what we need to do is to be satisfied in glorifying God.

Today, it is my prayer that i will point the youths to one who can give the eternal solution and remember that Christ is the author of their salvation, the provider of their needs and i am merely availing myself to be used by Him.

I dare not pray bold, aggressive prayers tonight, except ones that i will do what He wills and bare His cross with my life. Lord, i am nothing- You are everything. This song describes very aptly my heart cry today.

Who Am I

by Casting Crowns

Verse:

Who am I

That the Lord of all the earth

Would care to know my name

Would care to feel my hurt

Who am I

That the bright and morning star

Would choose to light the way

From my ever wondering heart

Bridge:

Not because of who I am

But because of what You've done

Not becasue of what I've done

But because of who You are

Chorus:

I am a flower quickly fading

Here today and gone tomorrow

A wave tossed in the ocean

A vapour in the wind

Still you, hear me when I'm calling

Lord you catch me when I'm falling

And you told me who I am

I am Yours

Verse:

Who I am

That the eyes that see my sin

Would look on me with love

And watch me rise again

Who am I

That the voice that calm the sea

Would call out through the rain

And calm the storm in me

Whom shall I fear?

Whom shall I fear

'Cause I am Yours

I am Yours

Psalm 8:3-5 (NLT) "When I look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers- the moon and the stars you have set in place- what are mortals that you should think of us, mere humans that you should care for us? For you made us only a little lower than God, and you crowned us with glory and honour."